He says something patronising
while blinking his button black eyes excessively.
I want to take the fork I’m using to eat my caesar salad
and jab it 
right into his left pupil.
I imagine it popping like bubble wrap
and then want to murder his right eye too.
I imagine they burst a bit
like eggs when they’ve been cracked wide open
I imagine blood dribbling down his face 
while he screams profanities about female dogs.
I don’t know why he's calling them stupid
I think dogs are quite smart.
I imagine the rhythm of his tantrum is almost musical
I know it would be a delight.
Music is always first on my list, when they ask what I love.
I imagine his spit fluttering from his mouth like a kaleidoscope of cabbage moths
while he howls like the dog he screamed about earlier.
I imagine I’d screw my face up in disgust
how inconsiderate of him.
Doesn't he know about germs?
I imagine him trying to staunch the blood.
His fingers sinking into the new gaps in his eyes
red tears streaming down his not-so-smug face.

I shake my head, like a wake up
and stop staring at the reflection in front of me.
This caesar salad is good I think
my best one yet.